{"id":238,"date":"2009-01-21T00:09:09","date_gmt":"2009-01-20T15:09:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.darlosworld.co.uk\/?page_id=238"},"modified":"2013-03-27T13:17:09","modified_gmt":"2013-03-27T04:17:09","slug":"olde-darlonian-sayings","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/darlosworld.co.uk\/old-wp\/gallery\/writing\/olde-darlonian-sayings\/","title":{"rendered":"There&#8217;s An Olde Darlonian Saying"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>What are the Olde Darlonian Sayings?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Quite simply, they&#8217;re sayings that I&#8217;ve come up with in spur of the moment situations to offer advice to friends, family and anyone else, in a way that they can interpret and use as they please. It&#8217;s always ironic because not only are they not old, in the vast majority of cases they&#8217;ve only existed a second or two before I say the words <em>&#8220;there&#8217;s an olde Darlonian saying &#8230;&#8221;<\/em>. Below are some of the ODS I&#8217;ve given out, but I don&#8217;t remember who or when for most. In fact, this isn&#8217;t the complete list. If I&#8217;ve given you an ODS and I&#8217;ve not mentioned it here, please let me know. ^_^<\/p>\n<p><strong>There&#8217;s an olde Darlonian saying &#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>*NEW* Let that Pooh stick carry on down the river after going under the bridge. You don&#8217;t need it anymore, and if you try to go after it (or are pushed in after it), you&#8217;ll just end up cold and wet<\/strong><\/li>\n<li>No matter how new the towel, it&#8217;s going to have someone else&#8217;s hair.<\/li>\n<li>There&#8217;s nothing wrong with being alone, as long as you&#8217;re not the only one.<\/li>\n<li>He who brushes his teeth and clips his nails in the shower will have more time for fun.<\/li>\n<li>You don&#8217;t need to know the difference between manga and mangoes to enjoy them both.<\/li>\n<li>It is better to have entered and failed than to have never entered, got a splinter, have citric acid in the eye and injure your <em>personal area<\/em> with the aid of small toothpicks.<\/li>\n<li>Your car will run like a gold medalist until the day before your holiday.<\/li>\n<li>Circling around one topic will only give you one direction.<\/li>\n<li>When you decide to go the distance, be sure that your backpack is properly closed.<\/li>\n<li>Those who listen to old wives tales will soon realise where their old husbands have gone.<\/li>\n<li>Always weed out your village, otherwise you&#8217;ll get unwanted guests and your friends will leave.<\/li>\n<li>Procrastination is golden until deadlines come.<\/li>\n<li>You can only go as fast as the tractor in front of you.<\/li>\n<li>Thyme heals all wounds, but mint smells better.<\/li>\n<li>Life can treat you like a baby treats a nappy. It fills it with lots of nasty stuff, but sooner or later things will have to change.<\/li>\n<li>Even long-life milk will go sour.<\/li>\n<li>Grey hair is only awesome when you&#8217;ve earned it.<\/li>\n<li>Always look forward, even if you can&#8217;t see what you&#8217;re looking for.<\/li>\n<li>Lolly sticks don&#8217;t flush away very easilly.<\/li>\n<li>He who likes a good nailing will one day find himself of the wrong side of the hammer.<\/li>\n<li><em>&#8216;Could haves&#8217;<\/em> are a strange thing. They only exist when they actually don&#8217;t.<\/li>\n<li>One mans getting up in the morning is another mans going to bed.<\/li>\n<li>If you dry yourself before stepping out of the shower, you have less water on the floor to clean up.<\/li>\n<li>Learning a new language is a lot like a brick wall. It&#8217;s hard and something that shouldn&#8217;t be licked. But if you&#8217;re determined enough you can climb over it.<\/li>\n<li>Every so often life throws a can of pop in your face. That can will then drop to your feet and explode into a big sticky mess. Then a random stray dog will chase you down just to lick you because you taste good. Eventually you&#8217;ll get tired and just let him catch up and lick you. Although something gives you pain, pleasure can be had by another person.<\/li>\n<li>Having cake can be sweet, having grapefruit can be sour, but drinking sand can be dry and not great for your system.<\/li>\n<li>To those people out there who say that 4 day old pancake batter should be thrown out, I say <em>&#8220;I&#8217;ll have yours then&#8221;<\/em>.<\/li>\n<li>It has been said that a smile is more infectious than a cold, but it is much more pleasant for both the giver and the recipient.<\/li>\n<li>Flying the nest too early will lead to a very fast trip to the floor.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s ok to spread the focus at times, but the more you spread it the thinner the layer is.<\/li>\n<li>When you look at the floor, you see more than just rainclouds.<\/li>\n<li>When inspiration goes out the window, why not go with it?<\/li>\n<li>He who keeps poking things in his ear, is he who is most likely to discover something smart.<\/li>\n<li>Life is like a Marshmallow; soft, sweet, and so much fun when they melt and get stuck into things.<\/li>\n<li>By biting your tongue you only hurt one person.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div class=\"sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled\"><div class=\"robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing\"><h3 class=\"sd-title\">Share this:<\/h3><div class=\"sd-content\"><ul><li class=\"share-twitter\"><a rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\" data-shared=\"sharing-twitter-238\" class=\"share-twitter sd-button share-icon\" href=\"https:\/\/darlosworld.co.uk\/old-wp\/gallery\/writing\/olde-darlonian-sayings\/?share=twitter\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Click to share on Twitter\"><span>Twitter<\/span><\/a><\/li><li class=\"share-reddit\"><a rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\" data-shared=\"\" class=\"share-reddit sd-button share-icon\" href=\"https:\/\/darlosworld.co.uk\/old-wp\/gallery\/writing\/olde-darlonian-sayings\/?share=reddit\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Click to share on Reddit\"><span>Reddit<\/span><\/a><\/li><li class=\"share-facebook\"><a 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Quite simply, they&#8217;re sayings that I&#8217;ve come up with in spur of the moment situations to offer advice to friends, family and anyone else, in a way that they can interpret and use as they please. It&#8217;s always ironic because not only are they not old, in the vast &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/darlosworld.co.uk\/old-wp\/gallery\/writing\/olde-darlonian-sayings\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">There&#8217;s An Olde Darlonian Saying<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n<div class=\"sharedaddy sd-sharing-enabled\"><div class=\"robots-nocontent sd-block sd-social sd-social-icon-text sd-sharing\"><h3 class=\"sd-title\">Share this:<\/h3><div class=\"sd-content\"><ul><li class=\"share-twitter\"><a rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\" data-shared=\"sharing-twitter-238\" class=\"share-twitter sd-button share-icon\" href=\"https:\/\/darlosworld.co.uk\/old-wp\/gallery\/writing\/olde-darlonian-sayings\/?share=twitter\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Click to share on Twitter\"><span>Twitter<\/span><\/a><\/li><li class=\"share-reddit\"><a rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\" data-shared=\"\" class=\"share-reddit sd-button 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